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hello everybody it is 2026

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happy new year sir happy new

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year so are you excited for the

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new

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year no why not uh because you

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get to be older okay i mean is

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that necessarily a negative or

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it means

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that you get to die more you

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get to die more yeah i mean

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that's an interesting way of

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looking at life

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i guess i mean every second is

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really a second closer to death

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regardless of where you are in

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your life so you're not wrong

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do you have any plans for the

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the new year sir get a job get

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a job you bum

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so you're gonna get a job

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hopefully hopefully and thus

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starts your giving the u.s

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government your

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one million dollars of lifetime

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value yeah and productivity and

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whatnot that's that's the goal

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anyway uh yeah my my goal for

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2026 right now is hopefully to

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to move later this year we'll

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see how

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that goes but that's the goal

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yeah that's the plan anyway so

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we survived the holidays we

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hope that you

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enjoyed or at least were mildly

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amused by our two bonus

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episodes i am still partial to

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the

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jedi being cut in half by

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lightsabers i still think that

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that is the ultimate expression

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of jedi and the

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sith too i mean really they all

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need to be cut in half with a

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lightsaber especially under the

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reign of

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disney just saying you know i i

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just thought of what the

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purpose of double-bladed lightsabers

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is you

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could cut twice as many people

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in half yeah exactly

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well we have survived the

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holidays we hope you all did as

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well and really quick i

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normally ask for

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feedback at the end of the show

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but i'm also going to ask for

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it at the beginning of the show

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today

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what do you like about the show

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what do you what do you like

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about our podcast what do you

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want to

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hear more of what are some

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things that you think could

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improve the show we want to

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hear about that so

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if you're a listener please

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send us an email feedback@nontopical.com

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so that we know what we can do

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to make the show better while

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still enjoying ourselves well

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so i was thinking all right we've

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gotten through the holidays oh

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no you were thinking yes i know

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it's a dangerous pastime but we

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got through the holidays and

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you know generally in the

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united states

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the primary holiday is of

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course christmas there there

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are others out there don't get

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me wrong there's

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also hanukkah three kings day kwanzaa

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yule uh there's a bunch of

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different holidays that fall

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within the

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same time period mostly because

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they're all based upon the

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winter solstice but that said

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so we went through our phase of

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getting the the cacophony of

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stuff we've we've all gotten

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our stuff now

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and it got me to thinking okay

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so you have the myth of santa

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claus

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which by the way the current

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version of santa claus as we

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know him is largely driven by

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coca-cola

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that's not a joke uh based

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loosely on the original

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character or person of um sinterklaas

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or paranoel

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etc etc which probably also has

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roots staying back to paganism

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and all sorts of things all

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right fine

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regardless magical somewhat

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deity-like creature has

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delivered our gifts

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and it got me to thinking we

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get all this stuff and i know i'm

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grateful for the stuff that i

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get i

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know kit is generally grateful

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for the stuff that he gets

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although i wouldn't put those

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words in his mouth

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you are grateful right sir

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but but we have this santa claus

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guy and i know that there's

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rules the rule is he makes a

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list and

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he checks it twice to see who's

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naughty and nice and and he

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watches you as you see stalks

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you using elf on

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the shelf all right he sees you

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when you're sleeping he knows

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when you're awake all right the

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santa guy is

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kind of creepy luckily we we

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will for the time being presume

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he is altruistic he's just keep

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he's not looking at

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you when you're like in states

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of undress he's not looking at

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you in creepy ways he he's just

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making

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sure that you know he gets a

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general sense of your behavior

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i mean it technically only says

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that he sees

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you when you're sleeping he

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just says that he knows when

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you're awake yeah exactly he

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knows when you're

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awake that doesn't mean that he

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is watching you when you're

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awake anyway but you know i got

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to thinking

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the whole present versus cold

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thing is a sham and here's why

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i say that as a kid i was an

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asshole

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if you were to gauge my

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behavior on a scale of like you

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know naughty or nice i mean i

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didn't do

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my school work i was a pain in

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the ass to my parents even more

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so than normal and i was i was

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a dick to my sister and that

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was constant this wasn't like

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an occasional thing that this

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was my

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normal way of being as a kid

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and do you know what i never

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got coal coal i still got

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presents some years

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i got more than others and you

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know it just strikes me that santa's

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gotten lazy with his compliance

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you know everybody has to have

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compliance yeah because if you

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don't drive compliance of your

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processes and policies then

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people will just do whatever

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the heck they want if you're a

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kid

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and you were not good and you

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get presents anyway then what

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does that teach you uh you can

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do whatever

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you want you can do whatever

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you want all right so that's

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one issue is that the whole

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coal versus

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present thing has gone by the

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wayside and santa claus has

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really gotten complacent that's

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problem

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one but we have a second

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problem it's not just the coal

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all right that's problem one is

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compliance

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or lack thereof to the original

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paradigm but the second issue

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is wealth inequality

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all right as we all know the

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middle class zone is slowly but

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surely becoming

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just paycheck to paycheck

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versus what normally would have

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paid the bills perfectly fine

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just 10 years ago

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yeah and so the middle class is

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shrinking the rich are getting

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richer the poor are getting

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poorer

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and those rich asshole kids

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just get like endless gifts

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like they get so much stuff

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they get a new game

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system every year they get

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generalizing yeah they get all

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their fancy little tiny cars

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yeah they get the

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you know the new the latest iphone

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the latest android the latest

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the latest drones the latest uh

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you know

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three thousand dollar robot

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dogs really they get so much

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stuff and then they don't end

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up using any of it

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it's like oh we got all this

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stuff i'm gonna play with one

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thing and then everything else

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like kind of

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gets ignored or whatever please

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note that that is that this is

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not a true representation of

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all rich

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kids yes exactly and also i

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will say that rich entitled

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kids tend to be assholes again

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as the stereotype as

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the stereotype this is not

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necessarily saying that this is

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what we truly believe of all

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rich kids it's just

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saying that the stereotype is

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you have rich kids that get

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given everything and they're snotty

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little assholes

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so where am i going with this

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so we have two problems we have

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a lack of compliance on the on

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the part of

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this so-called santa claus and

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we also have asshole kids that

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have too much stuff

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and we have poor kids that don't

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like they get like you know a

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box with bubble wrap and that's

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their gift

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you know well no not really i

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mean a lot of less fortunate

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kids are able to get toys

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through like toy

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funds and things like that but

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yeah it's unfortunate you know

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it really is now we're going to

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get into the

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the story idea based upon this

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concept hollywood the deal now

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goes into effect now this is a

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new and

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original idea so we're going to

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we're going to lowball this

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initially but it's going to be

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25 000 for the

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idea plus five percent of the

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gross profits and we we mean

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the gross profits before you do

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any of your

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crazy accounting shenanigans in

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perpetuity across all mediums

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of sale so there's an elf oh

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boy and i think i've come up

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with a title for this uh this

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this story already i'm just not

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sure what the right tone is we're

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gonna call it elven hood

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instead of robin hood it's elven

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hood so you have an elf and the

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elf looks at exactly what i'm

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talking about

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which is he's seeing this

294
00:10:06,010 --> 00:10:08,730
disparity between rich and poor

295
00:10:08,730 --> 00:10:11,360
and asshole kids and good kids

296
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:12,920
and he's seeing

297
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:15,560
that things aren't quite quite

298
00:10:15,560 --> 00:10:18,530
right you know that everybody's

299
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:21,410
really getting presents nobody

300
00:10:21,410 --> 00:10:22,360
gets cold

301
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:24,190
and there's you know the kids

302
00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:25,720
that are rich i mean santa's

303
00:10:25,720 --> 00:10:27,580
favoring the kids that are rich

304
00:10:27,580 --> 00:10:28,560
for some reason

305
00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,560
and that's not right and so of

306
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:32,490
course he does what you're

307
00:10:32,490 --> 00:10:34,290
supposed to do he tries to

308
00:10:34,290 --> 00:10:36,100
follow the chain of command

309
00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:38,510
so first he goes to like the

310
00:10:38,510 --> 00:10:41,040
the head elf for his department

311
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,660
all right let's come up with an

312
00:10:42,660 --> 00:10:44,310
elf name before we get started

313
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:45,740
let's give this guy a name

314
00:10:45,740 --> 00:10:48,730
i feel like it should start

315
00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:51,970
with grin grin yeah it should

316
00:10:51,970 --> 00:10:55,080
start with that uh grin tea

317
00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:59,060
too short grindendorf grinendorf

318
00:10:59,060 --> 00:11:02,620
that sounds like it's from lord

319
00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:07,160
of the rings grinendorf it's it's

320
00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:08,040
like

321
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:11,140
the bad guy from from zelda but

322
00:11:11,140 --> 00:11:13,860
with a big grin on his face

323
00:11:13,860 --> 00:11:16,820
grinendorf i mean we can't use

324
00:11:16,820 --> 00:11:18,300
grindelwald

325
00:11:18,300 --> 00:11:21,770
because that's that oh no i

326
00:11:21,770 --> 00:11:25,370
said it oh no copyright oh no

327
00:11:25,370 --> 00:11:29,230
oh no uh grinsky i mean that's

328
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:31,200
it's a polish elf

329
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,800
we're good grinsky okay okay so

330
00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,300
we have grinsky this is so dumb

331
00:11:36,300 --> 00:11:38,700
all right grinsky goes to his

332
00:11:38,700 --> 00:11:39,700
like line

333
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:41,990
foreman oh i thought i thought

334
00:11:41,990 --> 00:11:44,000
you were saying the uh the head

335
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:45,710
elf name no no no the main

336
00:11:45,710 --> 00:11:47,160
character oh

337
00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:49,920
uh well now the main character

338
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,800
is grinsky well but that might

339
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,490
not fit it doesn't matter it is

340
00:11:55,490 --> 00:11:55,920
now

341
00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:59,170
grinsky so anyway grinsky goes

342
00:11:59,170 --> 00:12:01,950
to his his supervisor manager

343
00:12:01,950 --> 00:12:04,790
and says hey you know i'm

344
00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:05,960
looking at the gift

345
00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:08,150
piles and i'm seeing that the

346
00:12:08,150 --> 00:12:10,260
gift piles for the rich kids

347
00:12:10,260 --> 00:12:12,550
are bigger than the gift piles

348
00:12:12,550 --> 00:12:14,140
for the small kids

349
00:12:14,140 --> 00:12:15,710
and a lot of these rich kids

350
00:12:15,710 --> 00:12:18,410
aren't that good we should do

351
00:12:18,410 --> 00:12:20,130
something about it and and the

352
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:21,060
head elf is

353
00:12:21,060 --> 00:12:23,450
like yeah but that's bad for

354
00:12:23,450 --> 00:12:25,020
business what business we don't

355
00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:27,000
make any money the business of

356
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,200
bringing cheer

357
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:31,550
and joy to the world of course

358
00:12:31,550 --> 00:12:34,760
right so he's not too happy

359
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:37,620
with that answer and he kind of

360
00:12:37,620 --> 00:12:38,960
ponders it

361
00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,020
You know, we should give him an

362
00:12:41,020 --> 00:12:42,400
animal sidekick.

363
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,820
Oh no. What type of animal

364
00:12:44,820 --> 00:12:45,740
should he have?

365
00:12:45,740 --> 00:12:47,940
I mean it's gotta be something

366
00:12:47,940 --> 00:12:51,260
that can survive in warmer climates

367
00:12:51,260 --> 00:12:53,000
anyway, because eventually

368
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,710
he's gonna be going other

369
00:12:54,710 --> 00:12:56,980
places. Can a snow fox survive

370
00:12:56,980 --> 00:12:58,980
in warmer climates? Yeah, I

371
00:12:58,980 --> 00:13:01,080
think so. So snow fox, what are

372
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,360
we gonna call the snow fox?

373
00:13:02,360 --> 00:13:04,390
Gotta give it a good name. You

374
00:13:04,390 --> 00:13:06,680
know what, let's call it Fundy.

375
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:09,320
We can do that. We can and we

376
00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,180
just did. Come at me Fundy.

377
00:13:12,180 --> 00:13:14,940
Look, we're advertising for

378
00:13:14,940 --> 00:13:16,880
Fundy. These are temporary

379
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:18,710
names. We're advertising for

380
00:13:18,710 --> 00:13:20,510
Fundy here. Look, the studios

381
00:13:20,510 --> 00:13:22,460
can change it later, but in the

382
00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:24,000
meantime, Fundy, Minecraft

383
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,140
YouTuber extraordinaire, watch

384
00:13:26,140 --> 00:13:27,480
him. Anyway, this is not

385
00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,340
sponsored by Fundy, but if Fundy

386
00:13:29,340 --> 00:13:31,050
ever listened to this, it'd be

387
00:13:31,050 --> 00:13:33,010
awesome. You know what, that'd

388
00:13:33,010 --> 00:13:34,400
be even better.

389
00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:36,700
It's a talking arctic fox or

390
00:13:36,700 --> 00:13:39,430
snow fox voiced by Fundy. That

391
00:13:39,430 --> 00:13:42,200
would be amazing. Alright, so

392
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,700
we have this snow fox or arctic

393
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:47,590
fox. Grinsky goes back to his

394
00:13:47,590 --> 00:13:49,900
room and he's like saying, you

395
00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:52,700
know, Fundy, I still don't feel

396
00:13:52,700 --> 00:13:55,400
like this is right. You know,

397
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,880
there are so many people that

398
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:01,050
have so little. And, you know,

399
00:14:01,050 --> 00:14:03,400
Santa is really just...

400
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:06,280
continuing the capitalist

401
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,220
paradigm here.

402
00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:10,540
By the way, I'm not an anti-capitalist,

403
00:14:10,540 --> 00:14:11,300
just for the record.

404
00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:13,110
But it's fun to make fun of

405
00:14:13,110 --> 00:14:15,520
capitalism. I will say that.

406
00:14:16,180 --> 00:14:17,770
So I'm not anti-capitalist. I

407
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,820
just like making fun of it.

408
00:14:20,340 --> 00:14:21,820
So he starts talking to Fundy,

409
00:14:21,820 --> 00:14:23,560
and Fundy is just like laying

410
00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:23,960
there,

411
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:26,150
being all nice, as a good pet

412
00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:28,000
does, feeling bad

413
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:31,140
for his master. It's fine.

414
00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:34,490
What is Grinsky going to do

415
00:14:34,490 --> 00:14:35,220
next?

416
00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:37,580
I mean, obviously, we've got to

417
00:14:37,580 --> 00:14:38,930
go to the CEO of this

418
00:14:38,930 --> 00:14:40,180
corporation.

419
00:14:40,620 --> 00:14:43,320
Okay. So...

420
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:45,600
Grinsky... Well, first of all,

421
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:46,930
though, I think we need a

422
00:14:46,930 --> 00:14:47,500
montage

423
00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:49,890
of Grinsky, like, trying...

424
00:14:49,890 --> 00:14:51,740
Like, draws up some charts.

425
00:14:51,740 --> 00:14:54,300
He's like, you know what? Maybe

426
00:14:54,300 --> 00:14:55,860
his boss also says,

427
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:56,850
and you know what? You're

428
00:14:56,850 --> 00:14:58,260
making these allegations, but

429
00:14:58,260 --> 00:14:59,840
you really have no data

430
00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:01,640
to back it up. Yeah. Where's

431
00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:02,700
the evidence?

432
00:15:02,700 --> 00:15:04,710
Hmm. So we should do this

433
00:15:04,710 --> 00:15:07,580
montage of him, like, actually

434
00:15:07,580 --> 00:15:09,460
counting the package count,

435
00:15:09,940 --> 00:15:11,260
actually looking at the naughty

436
00:15:11,260 --> 00:15:12,920
and nice lists and seeing how

437
00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:14,580
the algorithm has changed over

438
00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:15,380
the years.

439
00:15:15,380 --> 00:15:16,730
You know, how it went from

440
00:15:16,730 --> 00:15:18,220
being a manual process where

441
00:15:18,220 --> 00:15:19,780
they were actually using some

442
00:15:19,780 --> 00:15:21,330
kind of wizardry to look at

443
00:15:21,330 --> 00:15:23,190
kids, to where now it's all

444
00:15:23,190 --> 00:15:25,000
done by AI. Oh, no.

445
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,660
All right. And then he brings

446
00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:30,110
all this data. Well, no. In

447
00:15:30,110 --> 00:15:32,140
that montage, you have to have

448
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:33,990
him on the phone with customer

449
00:15:33,990 --> 00:15:34,820
service.

450
00:15:34,820 --> 00:15:36,950
That would be that pause moment

451
00:15:36,950 --> 00:15:39,250
that goes into reality where he's

452
00:15:39,250 --> 00:15:41,050
on the phone with customer

453
00:15:41,050 --> 00:15:42,930
service for what? Like,

454
00:15:42,930 --> 00:15:44,890
delivery for what? Like,

455
00:15:44,890 --> 00:15:47,450
because customer service...

456
00:15:47,450 --> 00:15:49,410
What is customer service for

457
00:15:49,410 --> 00:15:52,090
the elves at the North Pole?

458
00:15:52,090 --> 00:15:53,730
Hmm. Like, what do they need

459
00:15:53,730 --> 00:15:55,230
customer service for? They're

460
00:15:55,230 --> 00:15:56,840
manufacturing the toys. They're

461
00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:58,170
wrapping the toys. They're

462
00:15:58,170 --> 00:15:59,600
delivering the toys. I mean,

463
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:00,810
you've got to have, like,

464
00:16:00,810 --> 00:16:02,160
customer service for getting

465
00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:03,820
the materials for the toys.

466
00:16:03,820 --> 00:16:05,500
I mean, I guess. You know,

467
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,870
maybe it's, like, to gauge...

468
00:16:07,870 --> 00:16:10,120
Maybe they... He's contacting

469
00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:11,930
customer service to get a hold

470
00:16:11,930 --> 00:16:13,760
of their, like, numbers for,

471
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:15,760
like, complaints and stuff.

472
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,280
Yeah. Well, fine. But montage

473
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:19,980
later, he's gotten all this

474
00:16:19,980 --> 00:16:22,150
data. He goes back to his boss.

475
00:16:22,150 --> 00:16:24,210
It's like, look, I have the raw

476
00:16:24,210 --> 00:16:26,220
data. And his boss basically

477
00:16:26,220 --> 00:16:28,710
says, well, that's the way we've

478
00:16:28,710 --> 00:16:30,230
been doing it and that's the

479
00:16:30,230 --> 00:16:32,060
way we're going to keep doing

480
00:16:32,060 --> 00:16:32,820
it.

481
00:16:32,820 --> 00:16:34,640
So he starts going to his other

482
00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:36,380
elves and none of them seem to

483
00:16:36,380 --> 00:16:38,400
have an issue with it either.

484
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:40,150
What do we do now? The other

485
00:16:40,150 --> 00:16:42,020
elves are kind of like, yeah,

486
00:16:42,020 --> 00:16:44,060
maybe something should happen,

487
00:16:44,060 --> 00:16:45,930
but, like, it's too much work

488
00:16:45,930 --> 00:16:47,790
and it's just going to get shot

489
00:16:47,790 --> 00:16:50,180
down by upper management anyway.

490
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:52,990
why do we even bother you know

491
00:16:52,990 --> 00:16:55,090
last time we tried to get an

492
00:16:55,090 --> 00:16:57,360
idea up to the upper ups they

493
00:16:57,360 --> 00:16:59,230
they they threatened to

494
00:16:59,230 --> 00:17:01,540
decrease our uh cocoa supply

495
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,860
yeah we need our cocoa rations

496
00:17:03,860 --> 00:17:05,400
like i

497
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,260
guess for elves cocoa is like

498
00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:09,280
cocaine you know like they need

499
00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,570
their cocoa damn it it's how

500
00:17:11,570 --> 00:17:12,120
they

501
00:17:12,120 --> 00:17:14,740
live eventually he decides he's

502
00:17:14,740 --> 00:17:17,180
gonna go to the big man himself

503
00:17:17,180 --> 00:17:19,530
he's gonna go to upper man he

504
00:17:19,530 --> 00:17:19,920
goes

505
00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:22,810
thunder crackles he he goes he

506
00:17:22,810 --> 00:17:25,500
goes to the ceo head head elf

507
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:28,330
himself santa claus you know

508
00:17:28,330 --> 00:17:29,300
and santa

509
00:17:29,300 --> 00:17:30,780
claus of course we're gonna

510
00:17:30,780 --> 00:17:32,510
make him like a corporate mogul

511
00:17:32,510 --> 00:17:33,940
you know that one day of the

512
00:17:33,940 --> 00:17:34,180
year

513
00:17:34,180 --> 00:17:36,710
he'll put on this the the the santa

514
00:17:36,710 --> 00:17:38,990
claus suit but really the rest

515
00:17:38,990 --> 00:17:40,710
of the year he he's he's

516
00:17:40,710 --> 00:17:41,600
wearing a

517
00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:43,410
business suit you know he's

518
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:44,940
standing behind you know

519
00:17:44,940 --> 00:17:46,760
stereotypical like he has an

520
00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:48,040
office with like a

521
00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:50,080
very like large looking door

522
00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:52,870
you're kind of sponsored by coca-cola

523
00:17:52,870 --> 00:17:54,480
yeah yeah he's got the

524
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:56,190
coca-cola images and branding

525
00:17:56,190 --> 00:17:57,690
you know like like with a big

526
00:17:57,690 --> 00:17:59,260
like thumbs up with the ceo of

527
00:17:59,260 --> 00:17:59,960
coca-cola

528
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:02,530
next to him you know from the

529
00:18:02,530 --> 00:18:04,910
marketing deals to use his

530
00:18:04,910 --> 00:18:07,660
likeness he's got everything

531
00:18:07,660 --> 00:18:09,300
going on um he's

532
00:18:09,300 --> 00:18:11,520
got the big mahogany desk mahogany

533
00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:13,590
mahogany mahogany mahogany see

534
00:18:13,590 --> 00:18:15,770
if anybody gets that reference

535
00:18:15,770 --> 00:18:17,740
he's got the

536
00:18:17,740 --> 00:18:20,030
big mahogany desk he's got his

537
00:18:20,030 --> 00:18:21,910
like his like black leather

538
00:18:21,910 --> 00:18:23,910
shoes like propped up on the

539
00:18:23,910 --> 00:18:25,320
desk smoking a big

540
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:27,270
ass cigar from cuba he's

541
00:18:27,270 --> 00:18:30,000
wearing sunglasses he's wearing

542
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,760
sunglasses indoors

543
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:33,470
yeah he he's the fat cat

544
00:18:33,470 --> 00:18:35,990
literally and figuratively yeah

545
00:18:35,990 --> 00:18:38,380
well maybe not quite literally

546
00:18:38,380 --> 00:18:40,290
he's not a cat but he is very

547
00:18:40,290 --> 00:18:40,800
large

548
00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:43,220
so anyway grinsky goes in

549
00:18:43,220 --> 00:18:46,150
knocks on the door gingerly santa

550
00:18:46,150 --> 00:18:47,690
doesn't even know who the hell

551
00:18:47,690 --> 00:18:49,090
he is because he's at the top

552
00:18:49,090 --> 00:18:50,440
of the corporate chains

553
00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:52,430
like he can't know every elf

554
00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:54,600
that is you know in wrapping or

555
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,510
in production or delivery

556
00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:57,380
packaging

557
00:18:57,380 --> 00:18:59,220
whatever like he doesn't know

558
00:18:59,220 --> 00:19:00,920
any of that he just sees like a

559
00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:02,480
little elf and he's like

560
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,410
i mean i i have an open door

561
00:19:04,410 --> 00:19:06,800
policy but who the hell are you

562
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,400
yeah i i welcome your feedback

563
00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:12,080
but so it's like yeah i'm grinty

564
00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:14,200
or grinsky uh

565
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:16,730
uh well that came back quickly

566
00:19:16,730 --> 00:19:18,940
i'm grinsky and uh sir i've

567
00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:21,640
noticed some problems with our

568
00:19:21,640 --> 00:19:23,600
package distribution and and

569
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:25,310
you know inequality in the

570
00:19:25,310 --> 00:19:26,900
package distribution

571
00:19:26,900 --> 00:19:29,930
and you know he gives the whole

572
00:19:29,930 --> 00:19:32,970
spiel to santa he provides the

573
00:19:32,970 --> 00:19:34,780
powerpoint deck

574
00:19:34,780 --> 00:19:36,620
he gives them the spreadsheets

575
00:19:36,620 --> 00:19:38,240
he gives them the evidence

576
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:42,250
and we're gonna do the stereotypical

577
00:19:42,250 --> 00:19:45,480
thing where santa's like you

578
00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:47,910
know you bring up some good

579
00:19:47,910 --> 00:19:48,600
points

580
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,250
i'm gonna look over all these

581
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:53,430
numbers in this data and take

582
00:19:53,430 --> 00:19:55,240
it under advisement

583
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:57,580
grinsky is like oh thank you

584
00:19:57,580 --> 00:19:58,700
sir thank you

585
00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:00,620
and he leaves the minute he

586
00:20:00,620 --> 00:20:03,040
leaves santa presses the button

587
00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:04,200
on the intercom

588
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,660
hey get me a hold of the

589
00:20:06,660 --> 00:20:09,080
manager for grinsky

590
00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:12,150
and the next thing you know grinsky

591
00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:14,590
and and his fox friend fundy

592
00:20:14,590 --> 00:20:16,680
are getting thrown out

593
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:21,010
now grinsky could you know with

594
00:20:21,010 --> 00:20:24,600
his elf feet cold in the snow

595
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,730
he could feel defeated and

596
00:20:26,730 --> 00:20:29,340
initially he does after all he's

597
00:20:29,340 --> 00:20:32,270
given his entire life to santa

598
00:20:32,270 --> 00:20:32,920
corp

599
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:36,330
he's he's gif all incorporated

600
00:20:36,330 --> 00:20:39,520
yeah he's trying to work his

601
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:41,440
way up from a lowly

602
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,980
santa letter deliverer in the

603
00:20:44,980 --> 00:20:48,410
mail room to toy idea or like

604
00:20:48,410 --> 00:20:50,230
working with the major

605
00:20:50,230 --> 00:20:52,420
companies like microsoft

606
00:20:52,420 --> 00:20:54,980
and sony for the xbox and playstation

607
00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:57,340
you know business relationships

608
00:20:57,340 --> 00:21:01,110
he's he's really done

609
00:21:01,110 --> 00:21:01,660
everything

610
00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:04,310
he can and now he's thrown out

611
00:21:04,310 --> 00:21:07,260
but what happens well initially

612
00:21:07,260 --> 00:21:10,000
he's sad but then he gets mad

613
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,900
if no one else is going to do

614
00:21:12,900 --> 00:21:15,920
anything about this i will

615
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:19,670
and so he begins his journey

616
00:21:19,670 --> 00:21:24,080
and you know he builds himself

617
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:25,640
a workshop

618
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:28,300
he builds his own kind of magic

619
00:21:28,300 --> 00:21:30,060
sled and he decides

620
00:21:30,060 --> 00:21:32,360
i would say fundy builds the

621
00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:34,080
sled fundy helps build the sled

622
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:35,410
yeah and fundy helps test the

623
00:21:35,410 --> 00:21:36,180
sled you know

624
00:21:36,180 --> 00:21:37,600
like you have like a puff of

625
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:39,150
smoke that hits him in the face

626
00:21:39,150 --> 00:21:40,980
and he instead of being an arctic

627
00:21:40,980 --> 00:21:41,180
fox

628
00:21:41,180 --> 00:21:43,350
he gets covered with yeah you

629
00:21:43,350 --> 00:21:45,430
know like that type of stuff

630
00:21:45,430 --> 00:21:47,720
but we have to pick a date here

631
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:49,680
so he doesn't want to interfere

632
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:51,420
with santa's delivery of the

633
00:21:51,420 --> 00:21:52,980
packages because i mean

634
00:21:52,980 --> 00:21:55,290
he's not going to go up against

635
00:21:55,290 --> 00:21:57,340
the big man you know not yet

636
00:21:57,340 --> 00:21:59,800
anyway and eventually he has to

637
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:00,260
like

638
00:22:00,260 --> 00:22:01,490
make a new friend somewhere

639
00:22:01,490 --> 00:22:02,770
that believes the same as him

640
00:22:02,770 --> 00:22:03,960
and i don't know who that's

641
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:04,640
going to be so

642
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:07,840
i'm leaning on you to come up

643
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:11,150
with some ideas along the way

644
00:22:11,150 --> 00:22:14,580
here but so what's a good date

645
00:22:14,580 --> 00:22:15,340
after

646
00:22:15,340 --> 00:22:20,800
christmas when grinsky could go

647
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:25,540
for his very special ride uh

648
00:22:25,540 --> 00:22:30,780
the 30th you know yeah that's

649
00:22:30,780 --> 00:22:33,100
the new year's

650
00:22:33,100 --> 00:22:35,360
new year's eve eve because

651
00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:37,870
everybody's going to be awake

652
00:22:37,870 --> 00:22:40,370
on actual new year's eve yeah

653
00:22:40,370 --> 00:22:42,000
we can't have that

654
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:45,820
but at least this way the the

655
00:22:45,820 --> 00:22:49,240
impact is going to be felt yeah

656
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,640
and maybe for the first year he

657
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:53,600
only takes

658
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,030
one major city just to give his

659
00:22:57,030 --> 00:22:59,900
concept a try so what he's

660
00:22:59,900 --> 00:23:02,900
going to do is he is going to

661
00:23:02,900 --> 00:23:04,300
go down the

662
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:07,220
chimney of the rich folks

663
00:23:07,220 --> 00:23:10,420
living in like their upper high

664
00:23:10,420 --> 00:23:13,920
rises in manhattan you know he's

665
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:16,500
going to go into all the

666
00:23:16,500 --> 00:23:18,650
all the apartments of all the

667
00:23:18,650 --> 00:23:20,600
kids that have way too much

668
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:24,660
stuff and are assholes. And he's

669
00:23:24,660 --> 00:23:28,770
gonna, you know, shall we say,

670
00:23:28,770 --> 00:23:32,880
we appropriate the funds. He's

671
00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:36,360
going to, you know, he'll

672
00:23:36,360 --> 00:23:38,660
be smart about it. You know, he's

673
00:23:38,660 --> 00:23:40,930
not gonna take everything. He's

674
00:23:40,930 --> 00:23:42,260
just gonna take the

675
00:23:42,260 --> 00:23:44,470
stuff that, you know, that the

676
00:23:44,470 --> 00:23:46,440
kids are gonna get sick of

677
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:49,440
anyway. Well, it's still high-quality

678
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:51,390
stuff. I mean, if you have

679
00:23:51,390 --> 00:23:53,810
three video game systems, well,

680
00:23:53,810 --> 00:23:55,670
what do you care if one or two

681
00:23:55,670 --> 00:23:57,670
of them go missing? I mean,

682
00:23:57,670 --> 00:24:00,040
especially if it's a Steam Deck.

683
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,230
Like, that Steam Deck can play

684
00:24:02,230 --> 00:24:04,370
anything. So who really cares

685
00:24:04,370 --> 00:24:06,300
if you get rid of, like, the

686
00:24:06,300 --> 00:24:08,390
Xbox and the PlayStation when

687
00:24:08,390 --> 00:24:11,920
you have the Steam Deck? I mean,

688
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:12,240
they're really

689
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:14,100
aren't that many PlayStation

690
00:24:14,100 --> 00:24:15,880
and Xbox exclusives anymore

691
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,250
anyway. So who cares? Yeah. But

692
00:24:18,250 --> 00:24:20,330
he starts taking the stuff. And

693
00:24:20,330 --> 00:24:22,510
then after he's taken the stuff,

694
00:24:22,510 --> 00:24:26,840
he re-gives it to the less

695
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:31,590
fortunate. That were good. And,

696
00:24:31,590 --> 00:24:34,340
you know what? His test goes

697
00:24:34,340 --> 00:24:37,860
over pretty well. You know,

698
00:24:37,860 --> 00:24:40,780
some of the rich kids were a

699
00:24:40,780 --> 00:24:42,220
little bit disgruntled.

700
00:24:42,220 --> 00:24:45,900
But many of them didn't even

701
00:24:45,900 --> 00:24:48,640
notice. And their parents didn't

702
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:52,400
notice. It's like huh, we gave

703
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:55,340
this kid 20 gifts and now there's

704
00:24:55,340 --> 00:24:58,540
10 and we don't even notice. So

705
00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:04,220
test run number one goes uneventfully.

706
00:25:04,220 --> 00:25:06,720
Yes.

707
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:09,120
Do you think Santa's reindeer

708
00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:11,830
can talk? What do you mean? Do

709
00:25:11,830 --> 00:25:14,330
you think Santa's reindeer can

710
00:25:14,330 --> 00:25:16,940
talk? Well who said he's using

711
00:25:16,940 --> 00:25:19,910
Santa's reindeer? Yeah, no, I'm

712
00:25:19,910 --> 00:25:22,820
just asking for side characters.

713
00:25:22,820 --> 00:25:24,840
I don't know that Santa's

714
00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:27,720
reindeer are really that smart.

715
00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:30,280
I mean, Rudolph they are. I

716
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:32,140
mean, plus, no offense, they've

717
00:25:32,140 --> 00:25:33,960
already delivered their gifts.

718
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:35,470
Why would they know anything

719
00:25:35,470 --> 00:25:36,220
about it?

720
00:25:36,220 --> 00:25:38,250
I know, but that is for the

721
00:25:38,250 --> 00:25:40,930
side character ideas. So do you

722
00:25:40,930 --> 00:25:43,640
think they could talk or no? So

723
00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:45,110
tell me how you would work the

724
00:25:45,110 --> 00:25:47,220
reindeer into it organically.

725
00:25:47,220 --> 00:25:50,070
Well, I have two ideas for side

726
00:25:50,070 --> 00:25:53,430
characters. Okay, go. So one is

727
00:25:53,430 --> 00:25:55,880
a nutcracker that was part of

728
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:58,130
like, you know, like the

729
00:25:58,130 --> 00:26:00,220
management people.

730
00:26:00,220 --> 00:26:01,860
Or maybe it had like a broken

731
00:26:01,860 --> 00:26:03,420
arm or something and it was

732
00:26:03,420 --> 00:26:05,200
disgruntled because it never

733
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,350
got delivered. Yeah, something

734
00:26:07,350 --> 00:26:09,070
but I feel like it should have

735
00:26:09,070 --> 00:26:10,570
been close to Santa at one

736
00:26:10,570 --> 00:26:13,380
point. Okay, like like the nutcrackers

737
00:26:13,380 --> 00:26:14,860
are like the Royal Guard or

738
00:26:14,860 --> 00:26:17,240
something. Okay, that's a

739
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:18,880
possibility.

740
00:26:21,220 --> 00:26:23,870
And then for the reindeer, she

741
00:26:23,870 --> 00:26:25,510
kicked out because her name

742
00:26:25,510 --> 00:26:27,940
wasn't catchy at all. Okay, so

743
00:26:27,940 --> 00:26:30,910
like... It's the dumbest reason.

744
00:26:30,910 --> 00:26:33,080
Like, like completely. It would

745
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:34,910
be bad for marketing. So her

746
00:26:34,910 --> 00:26:37,080
name is like Broomhilda. Yeah.

747
00:26:37,080 --> 00:26:39,050
Although that's from Robin Hood

748
00:26:39,050 --> 00:26:41,240
Men in Tights, but I don't care.

749
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:43,580
Her name is Broomhilda. Or just

750
00:26:43,580 --> 00:26:45,560
Hilda. We call it Hilda for

751
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:47,540
short. That's easier.

752
00:26:48,220 --> 00:26:49,780
Alright, so we have these other

753
00:26:49,780 --> 00:26:51,030
outcasts that eventually

754
00:26:51,030 --> 00:26:53,130
somehow hear about things, but...

755
00:26:53,130 --> 00:26:55,530
Let's go back to Grinsky now.

756
00:26:55,530 --> 00:26:57,510
So Grinsky's had his first

757
00:26:57,510 --> 00:26:59,730
successful run. And nobody

758
00:26:59,730 --> 00:27:01,890
found out about it because it

759
00:27:01,890 --> 00:27:04,360
was only one city. But, I mean,

760
00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:06,650
that's... That's all well and

761
00:27:06,650 --> 00:27:08,470
good. But now we don't really

762
00:27:08,470 --> 00:27:09,910
have any conflict. He

763
00:27:09,910 --> 00:27:11,860
successfully did what he wanted

764
00:27:11,860 --> 00:27:12,520
to do.

765
00:27:13,220 --> 00:27:15,150
So, where do we run into

766
00:27:15,150 --> 00:27:17,780
conflict? How do we introduce

767
00:27:17,780 --> 00:27:20,580
conflict into Grinsky's plan?

768
00:27:21,220 --> 00:27:22,900
Maybe, maybe he was too willing

769
00:27:22,900 --> 00:27:25,370
about leaving. Like, he came up

770
00:27:25,370 --> 00:27:27,500
with the idea before he, like

771
00:27:27,500 --> 00:27:30,020
right before he got picked out.

772
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:30,580
Okay.

773
00:27:31,220 --> 00:27:33,450
And, and like, his supervisor

774
00:27:33,450 --> 00:27:35,670
gets suspicious of that. That

775
00:27:35,670 --> 00:27:38,220
he went too lonely. Like...

776
00:27:38,220 --> 00:27:40,490
Okay, so... Maybe... You're

777
00:27:40,490 --> 00:27:41,940
kind of in line with what I'm

778
00:27:41,940 --> 00:27:43,720
thinking here. So maybe what we

779
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,220
do is... Now, keep in mind...

780
00:27:46,220 --> 00:27:48,400
They only did one city. The

781
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:49,840
world's got like 9 billion

782
00:27:49,840 --> 00:27:51,580
people, 10 billion people,

783
00:27:51,580 --> 00:27:53,220
whatever it is at this point.

784
00:27:53,220 --> 00:27:54,270
You're talking New York City.

785
00:27:54,270 --> 00:27:57,220
Yeah, that's millions. But...

786
00:27:57,220 --> 00:28:00,220
It's not a huge block. Yeah.

787
00:28:00,220 --> 00:28:02,060
You know, this isn't like he

788
00:28:02,060 --> 00:28:03,900
did all of Europe or all of the

789
00:28:03,900 --> 00:28:05,220
United States.

790
00:28:05,220 --> 00:28:07,220
But...

791
00:28:07,220 --> 00:28:10,220
Being North Pole Corp...

792
00:28:10,220 --> 00:28:13,220
They've got some metrics. Yeah.

793
00:28:13,220 --> 00:28:16,630
And they've got some super like,

794
00:28:16,630 --> 00:28:19,450
tiny CIA level GPS trackers

795
00:28:19,450 --> 00:28:22,150
that are embedded into the

796
00:28:22,150 --> 00:28:23,220
boxes.

797
00:28:23,220 --> 00:28:24,530
Not into the wrapping paper,

798
00:28:24,530 --> 00:28:26,100
because the wrapping paper gets

799
00:28:26,100 --> 00:28:27,220
wrecked and thrown away.

800
00:28:27,220 --> 00:28:28,220
Yeah.

801
00:28:28,220 --> 00:28:30,410
But into the actual product

802
00:28:30,410 --> 00:28:31,220
boxes.

803
00:28:31,220 --> 00:28:32,730
They've got like this little

804
00:28:32,730 --> 00:28:34,360
like label or something on them

805
00:28:34,360 --> 00:28:36,220
that just looks like a sticker.

806
00:28:36,220 --> 00:28:39,220
But it's actually GPS.

807
00:28:39,220 --> 00:28:40,220
And so...

808
00:28:40,220 --> 00:28:41,220
It...

809
00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:43,220
It just makes...

810
00:28:43,220 --> 00:28:45,190
A weird blip in the system to

811
00:28:45,190 --> 00:28:47,220
set up conflict later on.

812
00:28:47,220 --> 00:28:49,220
Former supervisor...

813
00:28:49,220 --> 00:28:50,380
Like another elf comes up to

814
00:28:50,380 --> 00:28:51,490
him, because this guy's a

815
00:28:51,490 --> 00:28:52,220
supervisor.

816
00:28:52,220 --> 00:28:53,150
I mean like, he doesn't

817
00:28:53,150 --> 00:28:54,220
actually do anything.

818
00:28:54,220 --> 00:28:55,220
Yeah.

819
00:28:55,220 --> 00:28:57,220
Uh... Sir?

820
00:28:57,220 --> 00:28:58,220
Uh... Yes?

821
00:28:58,220 --> 00:28:59,640
We were just looking at the

822
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:00,820
analytics dashboard and we

823
00:29:00,820 --> 00:29:02,220
found something...

824
00:29:02,220 --> 00:29:03,220
Unusual.

825
00:29:03,220 --> 00:29:04,220
Well, what do you mean?

826
00:29:04,220 --> 00:29:06,300
Well, it's just a small anomaly,

827
00:29:06,300 --> 00:29:07,220
but...

828
00:29:07,220 --> 00:29:08,960
It looks like some of the

829
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:11,220
packages shift locations.

830
00:29:11,220 --> 00:29:12,220
Yeah.

831
00:29:12,220 --> 00:29:14,480
Well, like, couldn't that be

832
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:16,750
just kids like bringing them to

833
00:29:16,750 --> 00:29:19,220
their friends' house to play?

834
00:29:19,220 --> 00:29:20,220
Really, sir?

835
00:29:20,220 --> 00:29:21,220
Like...

836
00:29:21,220 --> 00:29:23,220
Five days after Christmas?

837
00:29:23,220 --> 00:29:25,380
You really think that a bunch

838
00:29:25,380 --> 00:29:27,920
of kids just went over somebody's

839
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:30,250
houses the night before New

840
00:29:30,250 --> 00:29:31,220
Year's Eve?

841
00:29:31,220 --> 00:29:32,220
I don't know.

842
00:29:32,220 --> 00:29:33,220
I'll...

843
00:29:33,220 --> 00:29:34,220
I'll have to think about it.

844
00:29:34,220 --> 00:29:35,970
I mean, it is an anomaly, but

845
00:29:35,970 --> 00:29:37,720
we're really not talking much

846
00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:38,220
here.

847
00:29:38,220 --> 00:29:39,220
You know, it's...

848
00:29:39,220 --> 00:29:40,900
You know, we're talking about a

849
00:29:40,900 --> 00:29:42,220
percent of a percent.

850
00:29:42,220 --> 00:29:44,430
I mean, that's not really going

851
00:29:44,430 --> 00:29:46,560
to impact the Joy Quotient this

852
00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:47,220
year.

853
00:29:48,220 --> 00:29:49,220
So...

854
00:29:49,220 --> 00:29:50,220
We'll keep an eye on it.

855
00:29:50,220 --> 00:29:51,010
You know, we'll keep an eye on

856
00:29:51,010 --> 00:29:51,220
it.

857
00:29:51,220 --> 00:29:52,220
And then...

858
00:29:52,220 --> 00:29:53,220
Lil' Up goes away.

859
00:29:53,220 --> 00:29:55,430
And then the manager sits there,

860
00:29:55,430 --> 00:29:57,220
like, just pondering.

861
00:29:57,220 --> 00:29:59,150
What the hell would call that

862
00:29:59,150 --> 00:30:00,220
caused that?

863
00:30:00,220 --> 00:30:01,220
That's just weird.

864
00:30:01,220 --> 00:30:02,220
Yeah.

865
00:30:02,220 --> 00:30:03,220
You know, what would cause this?

866
00:30:03,220 --> 00:30:04,220
And then, like...

867
00:30:04,220 --> 00:30:05,690
He's just sitting there for a

868
00:30:05,690 --> 00:30:06,220
while.

869
00:30:06,220 --> 00:30:07,900
You have the camera on him for

870
00:30:07,900 --> 00:30:09,510
a long, long time as he sits

871
00:30:09,510 --> 00:30:11,220
back in his manager chair.

872
00:30:11,220 --> 00:30:12,830
And then he snaps forward and

873
00:30:12,830 --> 00:30:14,220
they do the close-up.

874
00:30:16,220 --> 00:30:17,220
Grinske!

875
00:30:17,220 --> 00:30:20,480
Meanwhile, Grinske is trying to

876
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,850
figure out how to build out his

877
00:30:22,850 --> 00:30:24,220
operation.

878
00:30:24,220 --> 00:30:26,570
And, you know, he has a super

879
00:30:26,570 --> 00:30:28,220
secret location.

880
00:30:28,220 --> 00:30:29,850
He's got the energy shielding

881
00:30:29,850 --> 00:30:31,220
to mask the location.

882
00:30:31,220 --> 00:30:33,340
There's no way Santa's going to

883
00:30:33,340 --> 00:30:34,220
find him.

884
00:30:34,220 --> 00:30:35,970
There's no way North Pole Corp

885
00:30:35,970 --> 00:30:37,940
is going to, like, come back

886
00:30:37,940 --> 00:30:39,990
and come after him for

887
00:30:39,990 --> 00:30:41,910
violating his non-disclosure

888
00:30:41,910 --> 00:30:43,990
agreement and non-compete

889
00:30:43,990 --> 00:30:45,220
agreement.

890
00:30:45,220 --> 00:30:47,420
You know, because when you work

891
00:30:47,420 --> 00:30:49,920
for North Pole Corp, you're not

892
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:51,720
even allowed to work for Amazon

893
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,430
up to a year after working

894
00:30:53,430 --> 00:30:54,220
there.

895
00:30:54,220 --> 00:30:56,480
Because they're a toy delivery

896
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:57,220
service.

897
00:30:57,220 --> 00:30:58,220
Yeah.

898
00:30:58,220 --> 00:30:59,990
That's a competing, you know, a

899
00:30:59,990 --> 00:31:01,220
competing company.

900
00:31:01,220 --> 00:31:02,220
You're not allowed.

901
00:31:02,220 --> 00:31:03,220
And surely...

902
00:31:03,220 --> 00:31:04,370
No, it has to be something

903
00:31:04,370 --> 00:31:06,220
ridiculous like 10 years after.

904
00:31:06,220 --> 00:31:08,220
Fine.

905
00:31:08,220 --> 00:31:10,220
And surely...

906
00:31:10,220 --> 00:31:13,220
So, by the way, this clearly is...

907
00:31:13,220 --> 00:31:16,220
Uh, not only a take on...

908
00:31:16,220 --> 00:31:18,220
On capitalism...

909
00:31:18,220 --> 00:31:19,910
And wealth inequality, it's

910
00:31:19,910 --> 00:31:21,220
also a take on...

911
00:31:21,220 --> 00:31:23,220
Corporate environment.

912
00:31:24,220 --> 00:31:25,380
Oh no, Hollywood's never gonna

913
00:31:25,380 --> 00:31:26,220
buy this.

914
00:31:26,220 --> 00:31:27,150
We need to make it more

915
00:31:27,150 --> 00:31:28,220
corporate friendly.

916
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:30,090
Well, yeah, but the corporate

917
00:31:30,090 --> 00:31:31,930
friendly part for them is they're

918
00:31:31,930 --> 00:31:33,220
gonna make money.

919
00:31:33,220 --> 00:31:34,220
Yeah.

920
00:31:34,220 --> 00:31:35,220
Yeah.

921
00:31:35,220 --> 00:31:36,220
You know?

922
00:31:36,220 --> 00:31:37,470
Making fun of corporations is

923
00:31:37,470 --> 00:31:38,770
something that people can get

924
00:31:38,770 --> 00:31:39,220
behind.

925
00:31:39,220 --> 00:31:40,220
This is true.

926
00:31:40,220 --> 00:31:41,740
Wealth inequality is something

927
00:31:41,740 --> 00:31:43,220
that people can get behind.

928
00:31:43,220 --> 00:31:44,220
Well...

929
00:31:44,220 --> 00:31:45,740
You know, the story of a small,

930
00:31:45,740 --> 00:31:47,220
mild mannered elf...

931
00:31:49,220 --> 00:31:50,750
Becoming the modern day Robin

932
00:31:50,750 --> 00:31:51,220
Hood.

933
00:31:51,220 --> 00:31:52,220
Stealing from the rich.

934
00:31:52,220 --> 00:31:53,220
Giving to the poor.

935
00:31:53,220 --> 00:31:54,980
And doing it in such a, you

936
00:31:54,980 --> 00:31:57,780
know, a way that, you know, isn't

937
00:31:57,780 --> 00:31:58,220
violent.

938
00:32:00,220 --> 00:32:02,220
And brings joy to children.

939
00:32:02,220 --> 00:32:03,840
I mean, think of the children,

940
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:04,220
sir.

941
00:32:05,220 --> 00:32:07,220
This movie can make bank.

942
00:32:08,220 --> 00:32:09,220
But anyway...

943
00:32:09,220 --> 00:32:11,070
How do we introduce Hilda and

944
00:32:11,070 --> 00:32:12,220
Nutcracker Guy?

945
00:32:13,220 --> 00:32:14,960
So, he's working in his secret

946
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,670
workshop to really improve his

947
00:32:17,670 --> 00:32:20,220
theft/delivery system.

948
00:32:20,220 --> 00:32:21,770
Maybe he starts coming up with

949
00:32:21,770 --> 00:32:23,450
teleportation stuff so he doesn't

950
00:32:23,450 --> 00:32:25,220
actually have to go into things.

951
00:32:26,220 --> 00:32:27,700
I mean, couldn't it be the next

952
00:32:27,700 --> 00:32:31,220
Christmas that he meets the Nutcracker?

953
00:32:32,220 --> 00:32:33,920
Or are we only doing two Christmases

954
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:35,220
in this movie?

955
00:32:36,220 --> 00:32:37,220
You know what I think?

956
00:32:37,220 --> 00:32:39,830
I think we have one of the two

957
00:32:39,830 --> 00:32:42,850
side characters actually be

958
00:32:42,850 --> 00:32:44,950
someone to throw a monkey

959
00:32:44,950 --> 00:32:47,220
wrench in the works.

960
00:32:48,220 --> 00:32:48,220
Okay?

961
00:32:49,220 --> 00:32:51,220
So, Hilda is perfectly fine.

962
00:32:52,220 --> 00:32:53,080
She's just the reindeer that

963
00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:54,220
got rejected.

964
00:32:54,220 --> 00:32:55,710
I mean, even Rudolph makes fun

965
00:32:55,710 --> 00:32:56,220
of her.

966
00:32:57,220 --> 00:32:58,220
You know, because of her name.

967
00:32:59,220 --> 00:33:00,260
Evidently, he didn't learn his

968
00:33:00,260 --> 00:33:01,220
own lesson.

969
00:33:02,220 --> 00:33:02,220
Yeah.

970
00:33:02,220 --> 00:33:03,220
You know?

971
00:33:03,220 --> 00:33:04,220
He became one of the...

972
00:33:04,220 --> 00:33:05,690
He became like the highest

973
00:33:05,690 --> 00:33:07,220
person on the reindeer.

974
00:33:07,220 --> 00:33:08,220
I know, I know.

975
00:33:08,220 --> 00:33:09,220
It's just...

976
00:33:09,220 --> 00:33:10,220
It's ridiculous.

977
00:33:10,220 --> 00:33:12,220
But anyway, so...

978
00:33:12,220 --> 00:33:14,220
I think Hilda is not our spy.

979
00:33:14,220 --> 00:33:15,860
I think it makes sense that the

980
00:33:15,860 --> 00:33:17,220
disgruntled...

981
00:33:18,220 --> 00:33:19,570
The quote unquote "disgruntled"

982
00:33:19,570 --> 00:33:21,220
Nutcracker...

983
00:33:22,220 --> 00:33:23,220
Is the spy.

984
00:33:23,220 --> 00:33:24,220
...would make sense.

985
00:33:24,220 --> 00:33:25,360
And I think the way that we do

986
00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:26,220
things is...

987
00:33:26,220 --> 00:33:27,900
So, the disgruntled Nutcracker,

988
00:33:27,900 --> 00:33:29,030
obviously being part of

989
00:33:29,030 --> 00:33:30,430
security and obviously being

990
00:33:30,430 --> 00:33:32,220
part of the upper levels...

991
00:33:33,220 --> 00:33:36,350
He gives Grinsky the API keys

992
00:33:36,350 --> 00:33:38,820
to be able to access the

993
00:33:38,820 --> 00:33:41,880
naughty nice list and all of

994
00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:45,100
the kids' locations and their

995
00:33:45,100 --> 00:33:47,220
demographics.

996
00:33:48,220 --> 00:33:49,540
You know, he gets the wealth

997
00:33:49,540 --> 00:33:52,350
index, which is actually being

998
00:33:52,350 --> 00:33:53,220
tracked.

999
00:33:54,220 --> 00:33:55,220
Which he didn't know.

1000
00:33:55,220 --> 00:33:56,350
Like he discovers that when he

1001
00:33:56,350 --> 00:33:57,380
first gets to see the data,

1002
00:33:57,380 --> 00:33:58,470
that there's actually like a

1003
00:33:58,470 --> 00:33:59,220
wealth index.

1004
00:34:00,220 --> 00:34:01,220
Of course there is.

1005
00:34:02,220 --> 00:34:03,010
So, as he's planning his

1006
00:34:03,010 --> 00:34:05,200
teleportation stuff, what he

1007
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:07,220
doesn't realize...

1008
00:34:08,220 --> 00:34:09,390
Is that the use of these API

1009
00:34:09,390 --> 00:34:10,220
keys...

1010
00:34:10,220 --> 00:34:11,900
These API keys are not the

1011
00:34:11,900 --> 00:34:13,220
master API keys.

1012
00:34:13,220 --> 00:34:14,220
No.

1013
00:34:14,220 --> 00:34:15,770
These are special API keys that

1014
00:34:15,770 --> 00:34:17,220
send his IP address...

1015
00:34:18,220 --> 00:34:20,220
Back to North Pole Core.

1016
00:34:21,220 --> 00:34:23,350
So, they then begin to reverse

1017
00:34:23,350 --> 00:34:26,110
hack into his system to like

1018
00:34:26,110 --> 00:34:29,220
really discover the plans.

1019
00:34:30,220 --> 00:34:31,220
And that's not good.

1020
00:34:32,220 --> 00:34:33,220
So, the year goes on.

1021
00:34:34,220 --> 00:34:36,220
He continues to make his plans.

1022
00:34:37,220 --> 00:34:37,910
There's nothing sketchy coming

1023
00:34:37,910 --> 00:34:38,220
up.

1024
00:34:39,220 --> 00:34:41,220
And the night of the 29th...

1025
00:34:42,220 --> 00:34:42,220
Of what?

1026
00:34:42,220 --> 00:34:43,220
Of January.

1027
00:34:43,220 --> 00:34:45,220
So, Christmas goes by.

1028
00:34:45,220 --> 00:34:46,220
Santa does his big ride.

1029
00:34:47,220 --> 00:34:49,260
And it's the 28th or 29th of

1030
00:34:49,260 --> 00:34:50,220
January.

1031
00:34:51,220 --> 00:34:52,300
And that's when the SWAT team

1032
00:34:52,300 --> 00:34:53,220
shows up.

1033
00:34:54,220 --> 00:34:56,220
So, the SWAT team shows up.

1034
00:34:57,220 --> 00:34:59,220
They break in.

1035
00:35:00,220 --> 00:35:00,550
They get through the magnetic

1036
00:35:00,550 --> 00:35:01,220
shielding.

1037
00:35:02,220 --> 00:35:03,220
They capture everyone.

1038
00:35:04,220 --> 00:35:05,880
And of course, this is when the

1039
00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:09,360
bad guy, like the traitor nutcracker,

1040
00:35:09,360 --> 00:35:11,220
reveals himself.

1041
00:35:12,220 --> 00:35:14,040
Meanwhile, Hilda and the fox

1042
00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:15,220
ran away.

1043
00:35:16,220 --> 00:35:17,220
Because they're just animals.

1044
00:35:17,220 --> 00:35:17,980
Nobody's going to pay attention

1045
00:35:17,980 --> 00:35:18,220
to them.

1046
00:35:19,220 --> 00:35:19,220
Yeah.

1047
00:35:20,220 --> 00:35:21,220
And so, it's not looking good.

1048
00:35:22,220 --> 00:35:23,000
Grinsky's been captured by the

1049
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:23,220
feds.

1050
00:35:23,220 --> 00:35:27,130
And he's being brought up on

1051
00:35:27,130 --> 00:35:31,380
charges of like espionage and

1052
00:35:31,380 --> 00:35:36,220
theft and all this other stuff.

1053
00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:38,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1054
00:35:38,220 --> 00:35:39,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1055
00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:40,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1056
00:35:40,220 --> 00:35:41,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1057
00:35:41,220 --> 00:35:42,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1058
00:35:42,220 --> 00:35:43,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1059
00:35:43,220 --> 00:35:44,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1060
00:35:44,220 --> 00:35:45,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1061
00:35:45,220 --> 00:35:46,220
He's being captured by the feds.

1062
00:35:46,220 --> 00:35:47,220
These are the real feds.

1063
00:35:47,220 --> 00:35:48,220
These are the North Pole feds.

1064
00:35:48,220 --> 00:35:49,220
They're the elves with attitude.

1065
00:35:49,220 --> 00:35:50,220
Oh.

1066
00:35:51,220 --> 00:35:52,220
Of course.

1067
00:35:53,220 --> 00:35:55,340
And so, he's being held in like

1068
00:35:55,340 --> 00:35:58,370
deep cold storage at the North

1069
00:35:58,370 --> 00:35:59,220
Pole.

1070
00:36:00,220 --> 00:36:01,500
You know, like 50 miles below

1071
00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:03,220
the crust of the earth.

1072
00:36:04,220 --> 00:36:05,220
So, so.

1073
00:36:05,220 --> 00:36:06,220
He's being captured.

1074
00:36:06,220 --> 00:36:07,220
He's being captured.

1075
00:36:07,220 --> 00:36:08,890
You know, like Santa and the,

1076
00:36:08,890 --> 00:36:10,500
the lead, and his former boss

1077
00:36:10,500 --> 00:36:12,220
are like, you know, we're so

1078
00:36:12,220 --> 00:36:12,220
disappointed in you.

1079
00:36:13,220 --> 00:36:14,360
You know, all I wanted to do

1080
00:36:14,360 --> 00:36:16,200
was make Christmas happy for

1081
00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:17,220
everyone.

1082
00:36:18,220 --> 00:36:19,020
That's just not how we do

1083
00:36:19,020 --> 00:36:20,220
things here.

1084
00:36:22,220 --> 00:36:24,220
It's all about the numbers.

1085
00:36:24,220 --> 00:36:26,220
It's all about the joy index.

1086
00:36:27,220 --> 00:36:29,400
Meanwhile, Fox and Hilda, Fundy

1087
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:30,220
and Hilda,

1088
00:36:32,220 --> 00:36:33,270
trek their way back to the

1089
00:36:33,270 --> 00:36:34,220
North Pole and they,

1090
00:36:35,220 --> 00:36:36,730
now like, I guess we have to

1091
00:36:36,730 --> 00:36:37,870
have them talk because it's

1092
00:36:37,870 --> 00:36:39,230
going to be kind of pointless

1093
00:36:39,230 --> 00:36:40,660
to have them randomly wandering

1094
00:36:40,660 --> 00:36:41,220
around.

1095
00:36:43,220 --> 00:36:43,930
They, they start doing this

1096
00:36:43,930 --> 00:36:45,220
planning.

1097
00:36:47,220 --> 00:36:47,880
They start doing all this

1098
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:49,220
planning.

1099
00:36:49,220 --> 00:36:51,220
They start doing all this stuff.

1100
00:36:51,220 --> 00:36:52,520
I mean, you can always just

1101
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:54,220
translate it using subtitles.

1102
00:36:55,220 --> 00:36:56,220
Yeah, whatever.

1103
00:36:57,220 --> 00:36:59,220
But, but they know the layout.

1104
00:37:00,220 --> 00:37:02,630
And they know that there's like

1105
00:37:02,630 --> 00:37:05,160
a secret, like hot chocolate

1106
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,790
exhaust, like pipe, like, like

1107
00:37:07,790 --> 00:37:09,220
a waste pipe.

1108
00:37:10,220 --> 00:37:11,220
And so they break in.

1109
00:37:12,220 --> 00:37:12,900
And obviously there's like a

1110
00:37:12,900 --> 00:37:14,810
bunch of like stuff, like where

1111
00:37:14,810 --> 00:37:16,470
they're sneaking around and

1112
00:37:16,470 --> 00:37:17,220
whatnot.

1113
00:37:18,220 --> 00:37:20,960
And, see, instead of destroying

1114
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,700
Grinsky's, you know, like, all

1115
00:37:23,700 --> 00:37:26,450
of his technology, they, they,

1116
00:37:26,450 --> 00:37:28,220
they impounded it.

1117
00:37:29,220 --> 00:37:30,310
Which was stupid on their part,

1118
00:37:30,310 --> 00:37:32,220
but hey, that's typical.

1119
00:37:32,220 --> 00:37:33,220
It's hysteria type.

1120
00:37:34,220 --> 00:37:35,220
Yeah.

1121
00:37:35,220 --> 00:37:36,620
You know, you have the guards

1122
00:37:36,620 --> 00:37:37,960
coming after them with giant

1123
00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:39,330
candy canes to like bash them

1124
00:37:39,330 --> 00:37:40,220
over the head.

1125
00:37:40,220 --> 00:37:41,640
You got these things that are

1126
00:37:41,640 --> 00:37:42,980
like machine guns, but they

1127
00:37:42,980 --> 00:37:44,220
shoot peppermints.

1128
00:37:45,220 --> 00:37:46,220
You know, those stripy peppermints.

1129
00:37:46,220 --> 00:37:47,220
Yeah.

1130
00:37:47,220 --> 00:37:49,220
Not, not the soft mints though.

1131
00:37:49,220 --> 00:37:50,720
The soft mints are frigging

1132
00:37:50,720 --> 00:37:51,220
banging.

1133
00:37:52,220 --> 00:37:54,220
The Keebler Joy cookie cannon.

1134
00:37:55,220 --> 00:37:56,220
The Keebler cookie cannon.

1135
00:37:57,220 --> 00:37:59,740
But, uh, so basically you have,

1136
00:37:59,740 --> 00:38:02,170
you have Santa, you know, and,

1137
00:38:02,170 --> 00:38:04,550
and everybody, the insecurity

1138
00:38:04,550 --> 00:38:06,830
starting to find out things are

1139
00:38:06,830 --> 00:38:08,220
going wrong.

1140
00:38:09,220 --> 00:38:10,220
Wires are being cut.

1141
00:38:11,220 --> 00:38:12,490
Somehow a fox and a reindeer

1142
00:38:12,490 --> 00:38:14,740
somehow spraying black spray

1143
00:38:14,740 --> 00:38:17,440
paint over the, over the camera

1144
00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:18,220
lenses.

1145
00:38:19,220 --> 00:38:20,280
And worst of all, the caffeinated

1146
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,220
hot cocoa machine is broken.

1147
00:38:22,220 --> 00:38:23,220
Yes.

1148
00:38:24,220 --> 00:38:25,680
The elves are starting to get

1149
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:26,220
upset.

1150
00:38:27,220 --> 00:38:28,060
In fact, that's, that's, that's

1151
00:38:28,060 --> 00:38:29,530
how they initially disrupt

1152
00:38:29,530 --> 00:38:30,220
things.

1153
00:38:30,220 --> 00:38:31,430
Strangely enough, all these hot

1154
00:38:31,430 --> 00:38:32,470
cocoa machines are fed from a

1155
00:38:32,470 --> 00:38:33,220
central source.

1156
00:38:33,220 --> 00:38:34,710
So they mess up that central

1157
00:38:34,710 --> 00:38:36,220
source and everything comes to

1158
00:38:36,220 --> 00:38:37,220
a grinding halt.

1159
00:38:38,220 --> 00:38:38,890
It's like there's, there's a

1160
00:38:38,890 --> 00:38:40,220
few mixers around.

1161
00:38:41,220 --> 00:38:42,450
Like the, the, the, the, the,

1162
00:38:42,450 --> 00:38:43,220
you know.

1163
00:38:44,220 --> 00:38:44,720
You know, and maybe some of,

1164
00:38:44,720 --> 00:38:46,220
you know, we set up that there

1165
00:38:46,220 --> 00:38:47,540
were a couple of elves that

1166
00:38:47,540 --> 00:38:49,530
maybe wanted things to be more

1167
00:38:49,530 --> 00:38:50,220
equal.

1168
00:38:50,220 --> 00:38:51,930
And so they end up helping Grinsky

1169
00:38:51,930 --> 00:38:53,270
and letting him get by some

1170
00:38:53,270 --> 00:38:54,220
checkpoints.

1171
00:38:54,220 --> 00:38:55,220
Yeah.

1172
00:38:55,220 --> 00:38:57,220
They slip him the key card.

1173
00:38:57,220 --> 00:38:58,220
Yeah.

1174
00:38:58,220 --> 00:38:59,220
They slip him the key card.

1175
00:38:59,220 --> 00:39:00,620
They get over to the, the

1176
00:39:00,620 --> 00:39:02,220
teleportation sleigh.

1177
00:39:03,220 --> 00:39:04,220
That's like fully automated.

1178
00:39:04,220 --> 00:39:08,220
He has Hilda run in front of it.

1179
00:39:09,220 --> 00:39:10,220
She pulls his sleigh.

1180
00:39:10,220 --> 00:39:11,780
Cause you know what, despite

1181
00:39:11,780 --> 00:39:13,280
the fact that she wasn't good

1182
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:14,790
enough for the regular, you

1183
00:39:14,790 --> 00:39:16,220
know, reindeer team.

1184
00:39:17,220 --> 00:39:19,070
She's somehow is strong enough

1185
00:39:19,070 --> 00:39:20,730
in of herself to pull this

1186
00:39:20,730 --> 00:39:22,470
entire thing, even though it's

1187
00:39:22,470 --> 00:39:24,220
somewhat automated too.

1188
00:39:24,220 --> 00:39:26,150
So it doesn't really need her,

1189
00:39:26,150 --> 00:39:27,220
but it's symbolic.

1190
00:39:27,220 --> 00:39:28,220
Yeah.

1191
00:39:28,220 --> 00:39:29,320
Maybe, you know, the initial

1192
00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:30,390
thrusters can't get it off the

1193
00:39:30,390 --> 00:39:31,460
ground or something like they

1194
00:39:31,460 --> 00:39:32,220
disabled them.

1195
00:39:33,220 --> 00:39:34,110
And she's able to get it off

1196
00:39:34,110 --> 00:39:35,740
the ground and then he can put

1197
00:39:35,740 --> 00:39:37,220
it into hover mode.

1198
00:39:38,220 --> 00:39:39,220
Yeah.

1199
00:39:39,220 --> 00:39:40,220
So he escapes.

1200
00:39:40,220 --> 00:39:41,220
Now hear me out though.

1201
00:39:41,220 --> 00:39:43,110
What if the nutcracker guy like

1202
00:39:43,110 --> 00:39:45,020
jumps and grabs it right before

1203
00:39:45,020 --> 00:39:46,220
they teleport?

1204
00:39:47,220 --> 00:39:49,710
Well, so nutcracker guy grabs

1205
00:39:49,710 --> 00:39:50,220
on.

1206
00:39:51,220 --> 00:39:52,270
Grinsky hits the teleport

1207
00:39:52,270 --> 00:39:54,450
button and they teleport like

1208
00:39:54,450 --> 00:39:57,220
to like 15,000 feet.

1209
00:39:58,220 --> 00:39:58,900
You know, they see that he's on

1210
00:39:58,900 --> 00:40:00,570
there, but you know, his hand

1211
00:40:00,570 --> 00:40:02,100
slips and he's got one hand

1212
00:40:02,100 --> 00:40:03,870
left and he's like, please save

1213
00:40:03,870 --> 00:40:04,220
me.

1214
00:40:04,220 --> 00:40:06,290
I know I wasn't the best person,

1215
00:40:06,290 --> 00:40:08,220
but please try to save him.

1216
00:40:09,220 --> 00:40:10,220
And they can't.

1217
00:40:10,220 --> 00:40:11,600
And he slips and he starts

1218
00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:12,220
falling.

1219
00:40:14,220 --> 00:40:15,870
And as they're falling, like

1220
00:40:15,870 --> 00:40:17,330
Santa and the manager are

1221
00:40:17,330 --> 00:40:18,840
watching on the monitors and

1222
00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:20,220
they're going, no.

1223
00:40:20,220 --> 00:40:24,220
And it's like, as he gets away.

1224
00:40:25,220 --> 00:40:26,230
So Grinsky successfully does

1225
00:40:26,230 --> 00:40:28,220
everything he plans to do.

1226
00:40:28,220 --> 00:40:29,220
They're celebrating.

1227
00:40:30,220 --> 00:40:30,750
He goes across the world and

1228
00:40:30,750 --> 00:40:32,560
does this redistribution of toy

1229
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:33,220
wealth.

1230
00:40:34,220 --> 00:40:36,080
In the end, we have to drive

1231
00:40:36,080 --> 00:40:37,220
change.

1232
00:40:37,220 --> 00:40:38,220
Yeah.

1233
00:40:38,220 --> 00:40:39,220
We have to drive change.

1234
00:40:39,220 --> 00:40:40,890
And so the news reports start

1235
00:40:40,890 --> 00:40:42,650
pouring in about weird thefts

1236
00:40:42,650 --> 00:40:44,220
that have taken place.

1237
00:40:45,220 --> 00:40:46,500
But they can't pinpoint who

1238
00:40:46,500 --> 00:40:49,220
stuff got stolen and when like,

1239
00:40:49,220 --> 00:40:51,210
he somehow has technology as

1240
00:40:51,210 --> 00:40:53,190
well where it like resets and

1241
00:40:53,190 --> 00:40:55,180
changes the Mac addresses on

1242
00:40:55,180 --> 00:40:57,400
any devices, you know, so that

1243
00:40:57,400 --> 00:40:59,220
they can't be traced.

1244
00:41:00,220 --> 00:41:00,980
They're doing Mac address spoofing

1245
00:41:00,980 --> 00:41:01,220
and stuff.

1246
00:41:01,220 --> 00:41:02,220
Yeah.

1247
00:41:02,220 --> 00:41:04,220
You know, all of that.

1248
00:41:05,220 --> 00:41:06,430
But as a result of this, what

1249
00:41:06,430 --> 00:41:08,840
the news reports report is that

1250
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:11,010
people are happier this New

1251
00:41:11,010 --> 00:41:13,380
Year's Eve than they've been in

1252
00:41:13,380 --> 00:41:15,220
many, many years.

1253
00:41:16,220 --> 00:41:17,860
So Santa and the manager are

1254
00:41:17,860 --> 00:41:19,220
looking this over.

1255
00:41:19,220 --> 00:41:21,060
They're seeing the joy index go

1256
00:41:21,060 --> 00:41:22,220
off the charts.

1257
00:41:23,220 --> 00:41:24,290
You know, you've got kids that

1258
00:41:24,290 --> 00:41:26,150
never could have afforded to

1259
00:41:26,150 --> 00:41:28,320
get some of the gifts that they

1260
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:29,220
always wanted.

1261
00:41:30,220 --> 00:41:30,680
Like, even if it's something

1262
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:32,140
like just a pair of really nice

1263
00:41:32,140 --> 00:41:33,430
sneakers like Air Jordans or

1264
00:41:33,430 --> 00:41:34,220
something.

1265
00:41:35,220 --> 00:41:36,220
Yeah.

1266
00:41:36,220 --> 00:41:37,360
You have this like less

1267
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,100
fortunate kid, plays basketball

1268
00:41:39,100 --> 00:41:40,600
and has always wanted a pair of

1269
00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:42,100
Air Jordans, but his parents

1270
00:41:42,100 --> 00:41:44,220
only make $10,000 a year.

1271
00:41:45,220 --> 00:41:46,350
So the joy index goes off the

1272
00:41:46,350 --> 00:41:48,400
charts and you see Santa and

1273
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:50,800
the manager sitting there like

1274
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:52,220
dumbfounded.

1275
00:41:53,220 --> 00:41:56,570
And eventually they call in Grinsky

1276
00:41:56,570 --> 00:41:59,320
and his two cohorts, Fundy and

1277
00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:00,220
Hilda.

1278
00:42:01,220 --> 00:42:02,290
And he's like, you know, maybe

1279
00:42:02,290 --> 00:42:04,220
we lost our way somewhere.

1280
00:42:05,220 --> 00:42:06,920
Maybe North Pole Corp shouldn't

1281
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:09,470
be about this business of, you

1282
00:42:09,470 --> 00:42:11,950
know, 5% year over year joy

1283
00:42:11,950 --> 00:42:13,220
increases.

1284
00:42:14,220 --> 00:42:15,570
Maybe we should be doing it for

1285
00:42:15,570 --> 00:42:18,220
the betterment of mankind.

1286
00:42:19,220 --> 00:42:21,350
Maybe it should be, we should

1287
00:42:21,350 --> 00:42:24,170
be about every child getting

1288
00:42:24,170 --> 00:42:25,230
something worthwhile on

1289
00:42:25,230 --> 00:42:27,660
Christmas to bring joy and

1290
00:42:27,660 --> 00:42:29,220
happiness to their lives.

1291
00:42:30,220 --> 00:42:30,730
And then the ending you don't

1292
00:42:30,730 --> 00:42:32,060
see is every corporation

1293
00:42:32,060 --> 00:42:33,500
cutting them off and they go

1294
00:42:33,500 --> 00:42:34,220
belly up.

1295
00:42:37,220 --> 00:42:36,390
Yeah, it's not the greatest

1296
00:42:36,390 --> 00:42:38,570
story, but I think with some

1297
00:42:38,570 --> 00:42:40,890
tweaks, I mean, I wasn't sure

1298
00:42:40,890 --> 00:42:42,730
which way to go to keep it

1299
00:42:42,730 --> 00:42:44,850
lighthearted or to have it be

1300
00:42:44,850 --> 00:42:46,220
like...

1301
00:42:47,220 --> 00:42:47,220
Dork?

1302
00:42:47,220 --> 00:42:49,420
No, not even dork, like really

1303
00:42:49,420 --> 00:42:50,220
dark.

1304
00:42:50,220 --> 00:42:51,220
Yeah, that's what I was saying.

1305
00:42:51,220 --> 00:42:52,220
Oh, I thought you said dork.

1306
00:42:52,220 --> 00:42:53,640
Yeah, that's just dark and

1307
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:54,220
funny.

1308
00:42:55,220 --> 00:42:56,530
Like, not even funny, just like

1309
00:42:56,530 --> 00:42:58,750
really dark, like, you know,

1310
00:42:58,750 --> 00:43:00,900
like machine guns and like this

1311
00:43:00,900 --> 00:43:03,060
elf is like really disgruntled

1312
00:43:03,060 --> 00:43:04,220
and...

1313
00:43:05,220 --> 00:43:06,950
Yeah, and I don't know that

1314
00:43:06,950 --> 00:43:09,220
that would play as well.

1315
00:43:09,220 --> 00:43:11,820
But yeah, so Elvenhood, I'll

1316
00:43:11,820 --> 00:43:13,950
still, you know, maybe we'll

1317
00:43:13,950 --> 00:43:16,230
increase the idea cost to, what

1318
00:43:16,230 --> 00:43:18,220
do you think, 40?

1319
00:43:18,220 --> 00:43:19,220
Yeah.

1320
00:43:19,220 --> 00:43:21,220
It's not the greatest idea.

1321
00:43:21,220 --> 00:43:22,660
This is definitely, you know, a

1322
00:43:22,660 --> 00:43:24,220
made for TV type movie, I think.

1323
00:43:24,220 --> 00:43:25,220
Yeah.

1324
00:43:25,220 --> 00:43:26,780
Or like a Netflix original that

1325
00:43:26,780 --> 00:43:27,970
they want to make at the end of

1326
00:43:27,970 --> 00:43:29,220
the year to save money.

1327
00:43:29,220 --> 00:43:30,310
You know, something they could

1328
00:43:30,310 --> 00:43:31,220
use as a tax write-off.

1329
00:43:31,220 --> 00:43:32,220
Yeah.

1330
00:43:32,220 --> 00:43:36,510
But, you know, $40,000 plus 5%

1331
00:43:36,510 --> 00:43:39,220
of the gross before...

1332
00:43:39,220 --> 00:43:41,480
Oh, and I have to specify for

1333
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:44,040
streaming services, we are on a

1334
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:46,710
strict payment plan, a certain

1335
00:43:46,710 --> 00:43:48,220
amount per view.

1336
00:43:49,220 --> 00:43:50,440
You know, I don't know what

1337
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:52,220
that's going to be.

1338
00:43:53,220 --> 00:43:54,060
But we have a certain amount

1339
00:43:54,060 --> 00:43:56,070
per view if it's just streaming

1340
00:43:56,070 --> 00:43:58,300
because otherwise you really,

1341
00:43:58,300 --> 00:44:00,220
you don't make anything.

1342
00:44:00,220 --> 00:44:01,220
Yeah.

1343
00:44:01,220 --> 00:44:02,700
Like Netflix eats the

1344
00:44:02,700 --> 00:44:04,860
production costs, but then you

1345
00:44:04,860 --> 00:44:06,880
don't really get a sense of how

1346
00:44:06,880 --> 00:44:08,220
you make money.

1347
00:44:08,220 --> 00:44:09,860
So, that's part of the

1348
00:44:09,860 --> 00:44:11,220
agreement too.

1349
00:44:11,220 --> 00:44:14,220
But anyway, that's Elvenhood.

1350
00:44:15,220 --> 00:44:16,270
And if you like the idea,

1351
00:44:16,270 --> 00:44:17,770
please shoot us an email,

1352
00:44:17,770 --> 00:44:20,220
feedback@nontopical.com.

1353
00:44:20,220 --> 00:44:22,220
We always love hearing from you.

1354
00:44:22,220 --> 00:44:23,530
In fact, we haven't really

1355
00:44:23,530 --> 00:44:25,220
heard from people, so...

1356
00:44:25,220 --> 00:44:26,220
Yeah.

1357
00:44:26,220 --> 00:44:27,390
We would love to hear, get

1358
00:44:27,390 --> 00:44:28,220
emails from you.

1359
00:44:29,220 --> 00:44:30,140
Also, we are on multiple

1360
00:44:30,140 --> 00:44:32,220
podcasting platforms.

1361
00:44:32,220 --> 00:44:34,220
We're actually on Fountain now.

1362
00:44:34,220 --> 00:44:35,220
Right.

1363
00:44:35,220 --> 00:44:37,390
Fountain actually pays you to

1364
00:44:37,390 --> 00:44:38,220
listen.

1365
00:44:38,220 --> 00:44:40,320
Granted, it's in Bitcoin Satoshis,

1366
00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:41,220
and it's not much.

1367
00:44:41,220 --> 00:44:43,370
But you can in turn donate that

1368
00:44:43,370 --> 00:44:45,340
back to any of your favorite

1369
00:44:45,340 --> 00:44:47,220
shows automatically.

1370
00:44:47,220 --> 00:44:49,220
It's kind of cool.

1371
00:44:49,220 --> 00:44:50,220
It's kind of cool.

1372
00:44:50,220 --> 00:44:52,960
Anyway, so we're on Fountain,

1373
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:56,220
we're on Apple, we're on Audible.

1374
00:44:56,220 --> 00:44:57,220
We're everywhere.

1375
00:44:57,220 --> 00:44:58,220
Everywhere.

1376
00:44:58,220 --> 00:44:59,220
We're in your world.

1377
00:44:59,220 --> 00:45:00,560
So, share it with your friends

1378
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:01,220
and family.

1379
00:45:01,220 --> 00:45:02,860
We want to grow our audience a

1380
00:45:02,860 --> 00:45:03,220
little bit.

1381
00:45:03,220 --> 00:45:04,970
If you know anybody that might

1382
00:45:04,970 --> 00:45:06,610
like this, then share it with

1383
00:45:06,610 --> 00:45:07,220
them.

1384
00:45:07,220 --> 00:45:08,460
And last but not least, we

1385
00:45:08,460 --> 00:45:10,220
consider ourselves to be...

1386
00:45:10,220 --> 00:45:11,220
Value for value.

1387
00:45:11,220 --> 00:45:12,220
Value for value.

1388
00:45:12,220 --> 00:45:14,030
Which means that if you get

1389
00:45:14,030 --> 00:45:16,220
value out of the show...

1390
00:45:16,220 --> 00:45:18,220
Show some value in return.

1391
00:45:18,220 --> 00:45:19,220
Yep.

1392
00:45:19,220 --> 00:45:20,220
And that can be any amount.

1393
00:45:20,220 --> 00:45:23,220
It can be, you know, $3, $5, or...

1394
00:45:23,220 --> 00:45:26,220
Hypothetical $1,000.

1395
00:45:26,220 --> 00:45:29,240
So, we'd really appreciate your

1396
00:45:29,240 --> 00:45:30,220
support.

1397
00:45:30,220 --> 00:45:31,760
We were just talking recently

1398
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:33,110
and we were thinking about

1399
00:45:33,110 --> 00:45:34,600
getting a better microphone

1400
00:45:34,600 --> 00:45:35,940
setup that records on the

1401
00:45:35,940 --> 00:45:37,420
actual wireless microphones

1402
00:45:37,420 --> 00:45:38,220
themselves.

1403
00:45:38,220 --> 00:45:39,830
Which will help with any random

1404
00:45:39,830 --> 00:45:41,220
Bluetooth disconnects.

1405
00:45:41,220 --> 00:45:44,500
But, that's $300 that we don't

1406
00:45:44,500 --> 00:45:45,220
have.

1407
00:45:45,220 --> 00:45:46,220
Yeah.

1408
00:45:46,220 --> 00:45:48,570
So, anyway, I have an important

1409
00:45:48,570 --> 00:45:50,220
question actually.

1410
00:45:50,220 --> 00:45:52,950
As we wrap up the holiday wrap

1411
00:45:52,950 --> 00:45:55,170
up and season, was there

1412
00:45:55,170 --> 00:45:57,960
anything that you perhaps

1413
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,340
wanted to have in terms of food

1414
00:46:00,340 --> 00:46:03,200
for say Christmas and New Years

1415
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:06,220
that you weren't able to have?

1416
00:46:07,220 --> 00:46:10,220
Perhaps a cheese quesadilla.

1417
00:46:10,220 --> 00:46:12,220
Cheese quesadilla.

1418
00:46:13,220 --> 00:46:14,120
Sorry, we had to work it in

1419
00:46:14,120 --> 00:46:15,220
somewhere.

1420
00:46:15,220 --> 00:46:16,960
Now you know the origin of

1421
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:19,180
cheese quesadilla if you listen

1422
00:46:19,180 --> 00:46:22,220
back to one of our holiday pre-records.

1423
00:46:22,220 --> 00:46:23,220
So, alright everybody.

1424
00:46:23,220 --> 00:46:24,220
Thank you for listening.

1425
00:46:24,220 --> 00:46:26,590
We really appreciate it and we'll

1426
00:46:26,590 --> 00:46:28,220
catch you next time.

1427
00:46:28,220 --> 00:46:29,220
Bye.

1428
00:46:29,220 --> 00:46:30,220
Bye.